Avoid These 5 Phrases If You Want Your Child to Succeed

Ohana Magazine – Words are powerful tools. For Child, what they hear from their parents can shape their confidence, mindset, and future. While most parents want the best for their kids, certain phrases—often spoken in moments of frustration—can unintentionally hinder a child’s growth and potential. If you want your child to thrive and succeed, here are five things you should avoid saying and what you can say instead.

1. “You’ll never be good at this.”

This phrase is a confidence crusher. Children thrive on encouragement, especially when tackling something new or challenging. Telling them they’ll never succeed discourages effort and fosters self-doubt.

What to Say Instead:

“This is tough right now, but I believe you can improve with practice.” Encouraging perseverance instills a growth mindset, teaching your child that skills are built over time.

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2. “Stop crying; it’s not a big deal.”

Dismissing a child’s emotions sends the message that their feelings don’t matter. Over time, they may struggle to express themselves or bottle up emotions, leading to emotional stress.

What to Say Instead:

“I see you’re upset. Let’s talk about what’s bothering you.” This approach validates their feelings and helps them learn to process emotions constructively.

3. “Why can’t you be more like your sibling/classmate?”

Comparisons breed resentment and diminish self-worth. Every child is unique, with their own strengths and pace of development. Constantly comparing them to others can make them feel they’ll never measure up.

What to Say Instead:

“I’m proud of your efforts. Let’s focus on what you’re good at and enjoy improving.” This reinforces individuality and encourages them to strive for personal growth.

4. “You’re so lazy.”

Labeling a child as lazy creates a negative self-image. They might internalize the label and stop trying altogether, believing they can’t be anything else.

What to Say Instead:

“I know you can do great things. Let’s find a way to get started.” This positive reinforcement emphasizes their potential and motivates action rather than discouragement.

5. “Because I said so.”

While this phrase might save time during a disagreement, it discourages curiosity and critical thinking. Children need to understand the reasons behind decisions to develop reasoning skills and trust in their parents.

What to Say Instead:

“Here’s why this is important…” or “Let me explain why we need to do it this way.” Offering context helps them see the bigger picture and fosters respect for rules and decisions.

The Power of Words

Parenting is no easy task, and everyone has moments of frustration. However, being mindful of what you say can profoundly impact your child’s emotional well-being and future success. Positive, encouraging words build confidence and resilience, while dismissive or harsh language can have long-lasting negative effects.

So, the next time you’re about to respond to your child, pause and choose your words wisely. Remember, the right words today can lay the foundation for a brighter and more successful tomorrow.